Way back in the 80s, while the nation fought the war on drugs and practiced the “Just Say No” campaign, my elementary school gave us the opportunity to make a radio ad to promote this shit. Our task was to write a paragraph about what you would say to someone who offered you drugs (spoiler: say no).
I must have slathered on the bullshit well because my anti-drug paragraph won first place. Oh, I had my day in the sun too because the grand prize was to read your article on a local radio station for an entire 30-second ad. I don’t remember how many times I got to start over or yell re-do, but I sure got some fame – even my out-of-town uncle called to tell us he heard me on the radio. Super sweet.
Although I’m certain I had a great little speech and probably deserved to win, I don’t remember a damn word. Clearly, I’m no poster girl for the war on drugs.
“Alright, alright, alright.”
– Matthew McConaughey, in…